News Empire

23 Times Neil DeGrasse Tyson Was So Sassy It Hurt


Astrophysicist with attitude.

1. On the end of the world:

2. On measuring the length of blood vessels:

3. On intelligent life:

4. On alternative medicine:

5. On professional athletes:

6. On middle fingers:

If we had twelve fingers, there’d be no middle finger to flip at people with whom you’ve run out of words to communicate.

— neiltyson (@Neil deGrasse Tyson)

7. On The Los Angeles Angels:

Does it disturb anyone else that “The Los Angeles Angels” baseball team translates directly to “The The Angels Angels”?

— neiltyson (@Neil deGrasse Tyson)

8. On “toxins”:

The likelihood that a person uses the word “toxin” correlates strongly with how much Chemistry the person does *not* know

— neiltyson (@Neil deGrasse Tyson)

9. On Snoop Dogg:

If @RealJeffreyRoss and other comedians honored @SnoopDogg, would that be a “Pot Roast”?

— neiltyson (@Neil deGrasse Tyson)

10. On July 4th:

July 4 – Happy Birthday USA. Celebrating the day we declared Independence, and not the day we actually achieved it.

— neiltyson (@Neil deGrasse Tyson)

11. On “total eclipses”:

Total Eclipses occur every couple of years or so. If anyone calls them “rare”, ask if they feel that way about the Olympics.

— neiltyson (@Neil deGrasse Tyson)

12. On the state of television:

America 2012: The Learning Channel has HoneyBooBoo, History Channel has PawnStars: and the Science Channel has PumpkinChunkin

— neiltyson (@Neil deGrasse Tyson)

13. On the “Super Moon”:

Moon Lunacy strikes again: The impending Supermoon is to an average full Moon what a 16″ Pizza is to a 15″ Pizza. So chillax.

— neiltyson (@Neil deGrasse Tyson)

14. On hip-hop:

I’m quite sure that Frogs were into Hip-Hop long before the music industry was.

— neiltyson (@Neil deGrasse Tyson)

15. On soccer players:

I wonder what Rugby players think every time they see a Soccer player crying in pain from being grazed by another player.

— neiltyson (@Neil deGrasse Tyson)

16. On psychics:

A news headline you hardly ever see: “Psychic Wins the Lottery Again”

— neiltyson (@Neil deGrasse Tyson)

17. On Spanish sportscasters:

Good thing Spanish fútbol sportscasters don’t announce basketball, they’d spend 1/3 of playing time saying “Goooooooooooool”

— neiltyson (@Neil deGrasse Tyson)

18. On plane cabins:

Flight Attendants say: “Cabin pressurized for your comfort & safety.” What they mean is: “otherwise you’d freeze & suffocate”

— neiltyson (@Neil deGrasse Tyson)

19. On “Miss Universe”:

Astrophysicists are monitors of extreme adjectives. Which is why “Miss Universe” to us is just “Miss Earth”.

— neiltyson (@Neil deGrasse Tyson)

20. On airport customs:

Had to wait in line to renew a Passport allowing me to visit members of my own species across artificially conceived borders.

— neiltyson (@Neil deGrasse Tyson)

21. On Olympic curling:

I occasionally wonder whether people who are good at Olympic Curling are also good at sweeping out the basement.

— neiltyson (@Neil deGrasse Tyson)

22. On Red Bull Stratos:

I’m told somebody’s jumping out of a perfectly good balloon from 23-miles up. The theory of gravity no longer needs to be tested in this way

— neiltyson (@Neil deGrasse Tyson)

23. And on his DJ name:

If I were ever to become a Hip-hop DJ,I think I’d choose the name “MC-squared”

— neiltyson (@Neil deGrasse Tyson)

Read more:

Comments are closed.